LeToya Luckett and Tommicus Walker, Cassie and Alex Fine, Adrienne and Israel Houghton, Ciara and Russel Wilson are just a few of the celebrities that we look up to as having the model marriage.
We have watched these women go through almost a decade of wrong relationships, tumultuous breakups, and stretched out periods of singleness.
Some of us have cried on their behalf, entered our prayer closets on their account. Hurled unsolicited advice under their Instagram posts and dragged nay-sayers on Twitter threads.
Who then was anybody to tell you not to take it personally, when Cassie got hitched to Alex Fine. And when Ciara tied the knots with her charming, Russell Wilson.
So yeah, their Prince Charming finally showed up, but what about yours?
The scripture says “Your king is coming, humble and on an ass” but oh God, when?
What prayer did Ciara, Cassy, LeToya, and Adrienne pray to receive such wonderful men?
It only slightly amused me to discover that ‘prayer for husband’ is one of the most researched topics on the internet. Chill sis, on the way y’all worked up about finding your King,
The good news is Ciara, Adrienne, and Letoya did spill the prayers they said in their prayer closet.
And just maybe, you will find something to leverage on while you wait for ‘husband. Dear future husband’.
In a virtual chat, LeToya revealed the events that unfolded before she met and connected with Tommicus Walker.
If you remember, American Singer, LeToya was married before but her marriage didn’t last before they split. After her divorce, LeToya explained that she went through a period of loneliness and struggled with the feeling of not being good enough for any man before she met her now-husband, Tommicus Walker.
Constantly weighed down with these depressing thoughts, she decided to just let go and let God.
We know you pray sis, but do you pray and choose to have peace about it or do you constantly worry and scheme out plans of your own when God is not working fast enough to you?
She prayed a prayer of surrender over her future husband saying “I don’t want it to be what I want. I want it to be what you want for me.”
“Cast all your cares upon the Lord for he cares for you.”
How many of us can surrender all our desires to God’s will and leave it there?
Mostly, when it comes to prayer for husband’s we are usually down on our knees giving God terms of contract; he has to be as tall as here, he has to look a certain way, he has to come from this kind of family, he has to have this many degrees.
“And I was also one of those girls who had a list before, and I finally threw it away. Because, there were things that he had that were on my list, but there were other things that he had that I didn’t know I needed that weren’t on my list. Sometimes we can get in our own way as single women.”
“I just needed to talk to God. So I said, ‘Lord, I’m giving this all over to you. It’s too heavy of a burden for me. I don’t like walking around with it. Don’t like feeling lonely. I don’t like feeling like I’m not good enough. I know you made me to be who you want me to be, and I am enough. So I’m giving this over to you. This is not for me to figure out.'”
Before you jump on LeToya’s prayer train and are like oh lord, I surrender my desires in a man to you, take control. There was something else LeToya said she prayed:
“But I’m also letting you know that I’m so grateful for what you’ve done for me thus far. If I leave the earth and I’m never married, and I never have a child. If I leave this earth and all the desires that I have don’t come to pass. I’m grateful for what you’ve done thus far. You know what I want in a man, you know what I need in a man. I don’t want it to be what I want, I want it to be what you want for me.”
Phew, sis, it takes a heavy dose of trust in God to come to this place of total surrender. If you are close to your bible and familiar with God’s promises for you, I know you are probably sputtering but…but…the Good Book says…
Chew on that thought while we take a look at Adrienne Houghton’s prayer for husband:
Finding ‘the one’ was not a straight road for Adrienne as a lot of us who keep tabs on her life know. From a tumultuous split from Rob Kardashian and a six-year broken engagement from Lenny Santiago, this Latina born co-host of The Real thought God had done it – abandoned her.
“Moments like that can make you feel so low. There are so many things you think of at that moment that literally make you feel like, ‘God, why do you feel so far from me?'”
I have listened to Adrienne talk about going through obsession in a wrong relationship. According to her, she was knee-deep at a time, in a relationship that was not good for her. All the signs were being played out, her family had talked, her mom had expressed her displeasure, but Adrienne just couldn’t cut herself loose. To her, she had to have him and no one else.
She recounted a particular incident where something had happened between herself and her partner then, and she locked herself in the house crying, refusing to do nothing else. Her mom who happened to be around at the time said to her “Adrienne this is not of God’ and resorted to prayers immediately.
“I know that I know that I have a praying mom. And I know that I know that God had spoken to me and told me that that was not the man for me. But I wanted that. I was on some, ‘I been through too much. I deserve it, I want it.'”
Sis, while you waiting for the right man to show up, could you in the meantime let this wrong one go? You are not helping yourself in any way.
Adrienne went on to corroborate what LeToya said about resigning on our list and trusting that God will provide us with what’s best. She reveals that finding the man God had for her meant she had to let go of logic, all those ideas she had in her head of the perfect picture of her man. She disclosed that if she were to go with her desires for a husband, Israel Houghton didn’t fit the bill.
“It didn’t come in the package I thought it was. Do you know how much wrong was wrong with him? Had I gone off on logic, I would never be as happy as I am today. I went against everything that logically made sense.'”
Sis your husband may be right beside you, and you don’t realize it because he doesn’t fit into a certain persona. Now don’t get us wrong, we’ve been talking about ditching lists and being more flexible.
However, by no means are we encouraging you to settle-no way. We believe in being concise and specific about what you want in your future husband. Your non-negotiable needs (those things you consider a must for a successful relationship) which does not include; he has to have a certain height, work a certain job, live a certain way.
Ciara Wilson disclosed that her prayer for husband was not just one prayer but a steady stream of prayers.
After her very public breakup with her ex-fiancé Future, the singer revealed that she had to learn to love herself during her single period. Her level up which we all celebrate today came after she learned to love herself.
“When I started to get myself centred, I started to understand the power of loving myself. I had to commit to that idea. Let me love myself, let me get myself in the right place so that I can love myself. If I love myself, I believe I can get the love that I deserve.”
“I was really ready to take my time and be patient and let love fall in place the right way because I deserve something new. I deserve something different. Deserve to be loved to the highest capacity, and to be loved the way I deserve.”
This brings me back to one of our post on Alexilore ‘why I do not support serial dating’. Are you in the habit of jumping from one expired relationship into a new one without leveraging on your singleness to heal?
LeToya also believes that:
“When you’re in and out of relationships, you learn to practice divorce. It becomes easier and easier because you know you can survive that. When certain things would come up in our marriage, it would trigger certain thoughts where I’d think: ‘is it over?’ And I had to learn to work through that and let him know my triggers.
On Ciara’s prayer for husband Russell Wilson, she said:
“I prayed for a God-fearing man. Prayed for discernment. I prayed for wisdom to really learn from the wisdom that I’ve gained from the experience I’m going through. Prayed for a man that loved kids, because obviously with me having my son if you love me you gotta love him. I prayed for a man that was worldly as well because I love to explore. So someone that’s going to edify my world is important to me. I was ready to level up.”
Are you ready to level up? So much to take-away from the stories of these women but mostly you should part with LeToya’s advice to wives and single women alike; your prayer for your husband should not end at the altar.
“As a wife, you got to stay on your knees in prayer, because the enemy doesn’t like marriage. And you can’t take your prayer life lightly when it comes to praying for your husband, your family and for our covering”.
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